Category: lists

breaking research from the geekology laboratories

I mentioned yesterday that there are tests out there to help you determine how you fit into the geek/nerd/dork paradigm. There are many, many tests out there. I may explore these more, but here are a few (with my own results, when available).

Geek, nerd or dork tests

1. The “original geek test”
I like this one. And I actually like that you get bonus points for being a female geek. (Ha!)
I scored 23.07692%, which puts me at the (unmodified) “Geek” level. (There are, of course, higher levels of geek. You also get to have, should you choose, a button with your test results. Behold mine!
i am a geek

2. The Geek Test: How geeky are you?
This one is a shorter test, and may be derivative of the preceding test. (Or maybe they both are derivative of some previous source. Scientists at the North American Geekology Laboratories are furiously researching this question as we speak.)
Here are my results:

Geek Test Results
You are 47.5% geeky.
OK, not that geeky at all, are you? I’ll bet you even have a girlfriend (or boyfriend).
The current average score is: 31.55%
Fact: 35.45% of people who took this test admit to wearing a costume “just for fun”.

3. A nerd test, called the “nerd purity test“:
Here are a few sample questions:

Do you have a Rubik’s Cube?
Can you solve it?
Without the book?
Without looking?
Do you have acne?
Do you have greasy hair?
Are you unaware of it?

And here are my results:

Your Nerd Purity Test Results
You answered “yes” to 26 of 100 questions, making you 74.0% nerd pure; that is, you are 74.0% pure in the nerd domain (you have 26.0% nerd in you).
Your Weirdness Factor (AKA Uniqueness Factor) is 11%, based on a comparison of your test results with 576688 other submissions for this test.
The average purity for this test is 73.8%.
The first submission for this test was received June 16, 1994.

4. Another nerd test, this one called The Nerdity Test:

THE NERDITY TEST
Version 5.x.cubed.minus.3.x.all.divided.by.2
10 December, 1993
HTML-Version: 7 May, 1996
CGI-Enabled: 13 March, 1998
JavaScript-Enabled: 25 October, 2000

This one looks pretty good, and gets extra points for the version number. However, I didn’t finish taking the test due to time constraints. (Also, when I clicked on the “credits” link for one of the questions, I accidentally cleared out my answers for the test at the point, and didn’t want to go back.)

5. Blogthings had a pretty lame one. I’m not convinced by my results, even though the “nerd” percentage is somewhat similar to the previous test score. But come on. “no one would ever call you a nerd”? Oh, how wrong can they be:

You Are 24% Nerdy

You’re a little nerdy, but no one would ever call you a nerd.
You sometimes get into nerdy things, but only after they’ve become a part of mainstream culture.

6. To balance things out, we have a dork quiz:
This one is not interactive, but the questions do look fun, like:

9. Who do you most closely identify with?
a) Kermit.
b) Gonzo.
c) Scooter.

7. I’m actually most partial to the OKcupid Nerd? Geek? or Dork? test
I like it that this considers nerd, geek and dork to be dimensions, and helps you to place yourself on those axes. This one has some pretty funny questions, like:

When you encounter something you don’t know, do you often try to find out what it is? (Like an unknown word in a dictionary or event in an encyclopedia.)

Wait a second-there are people who would answer “no” to this question? I’ve often wished I had access to imdb while watching movies in a theater…

Do you enjoy quoting books/movies/tv shows, etc. in your conversations/letters/emails?

(Possibly.)

This test also claims to give a score about how you ranked on the three variable (nerdiness, geekosity and dork points) compared to others of your age and gender. Note that my score shows higher than 99% for all three. Which I thought was interesting. So I was curious about how I’d score if I were a male. Still got the same. So I actually tried retaking the test from a nearly totally different persona, a sort of suave but kinda dumb athletic type. And still, I get over 99% on the three variables. This suggests to me that a) this feature is probably broken, and these levels are probably not actually a reflection of the test-taker demographics b) I am really a nerd, geek and dork to follow up on this and c) I really should be getting back to the work I need to be doing and stop taking these damn tests.






, you’re now logged in!


Below you’ll find your test result. After, continue on to your
homescreen to discover what we’re about.







Modern, Cool Nerd

78 % Nerd, 65% Geek, 47% Dork

For The Record:

A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia.

A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one.

A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions.

You scored better than half in Nerd and Geek, earning you the title of: Modern, Cool Nerd.

Nerds didn’t use to be cool, but in the 90’s that all changed. It used to be that, if you were a computer expert, you had to wear plaid or a pocket protector or suspenders or something that announced to the world that you couldn’t quite fit in. Not anymore. Now, the intelligent and geeky have eked out for themselves a modicum of respect at the very least, and “geek is chic.” The Modern, Cool Nerd is intelligent, knowledgable and always the person to call in a crisis (needing computer advice/an arcane bit of trivia knowledge). They are the one you want as your lifeline in Who Wants to Be a Millionaire (or the one up there, winning the million bucks)!

Congratulations!

Thanks Again! — THE NERD? GEEK? OR DORK? TEST






My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 99% on nerdiness
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 99% on geekosity
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 99% on dork points

Link: The Nerd? Geek? or Dork? Test written by donathos on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

geek, nerd or dork?

I wrote a bit a couple of weeks ago about clique taxonomies, especially as they pertain to the high school movie genre. In my research, I came across some interesting tidbits, which I thought I’d share.

Most high school clique taxonomies make some reference to individuals who are not considered popular: the “outcasts” or “outsiders.” Most commonly, these “others” are labelled geeks, nerds or dorks. (Though the terms dweeb and spaz or spazz are not uncommon.) The use of these terms has usually been extended past the high school age, when clique membership becomes less clear. Interestingly, the taxonomies for these groups have become hotly debated.

For example Militant Geek (“Militant Geek Custom Shirts: Propaganda for a Geek Friendly Future”) offers these words of concern:

An alarming trend that we’ve noticed at the Militant Geek HQ is the sloppy usage of the terms ‘geek’, ‘nerd’, and ‘dork’. It was almost as if certain individuals assumed that they meant the same thing! For the record Geeks are those that have technical aptitude, nerds are bright but socially awkward, and dorks are just inept excuses for protoplasm.

This site has even offered up a “handy comparison chart” to help people understand the differences in the classifications.

Coyote of Not funny…ever offers these words of wisdom in a post called Geek Dweeb or Spaz?

Dork – (Pronounced “Door’k” From the Latin “Murdockious”) A Dork, like the Spaz has all the knowledge and ability of a Geek or a Nerd, but has NO clue

Buckethead of The Ministry of Minor Perfidy offers definitions and discussions in the similarly-titled though differently-punctuated post Geek, Dweeb, or Spaz?

Nerd: the nerd is base type, from which all the others are derived. Nerds are bright, and lacking in social skills. They have odd interests. They are dilettantes, and usually end up consumed by counterproductive pursuits like the SCA, Star Wars collectables, and Star Trek conventions. Some nerds can achieve purpose in life translating the arcane thoughts of the geeks to the mundane normal people. Nerds are hapless, though they often have a goofy charm.

90028549v8_240×240_front_color-black.jpg

And this is just the tip of the iceberg! Whether it’s the Wikipedia entry for geek an “ask yahoo” response to the fundamental question “What’s the difference between a nerd, a geek, and a dork?” or a discussion board topic on a site called Geek Culture. You can even get t-shirts that help you with the terms, like the cafépress “geek hierarchy” shirt:

Geek Hierarchy: Geek > Nerd > Dork. Geeks design it, Nerds buy it, Dorks break it.

Do you wonder where you fit into the picture? Do you have leanings of geekery, or hints of nerdiness? Or are you just a total dork? There are tests to help! (Well, to help you figure out if you are a nerd or a dork. Finding help with being a dork is another question.)

Okay, I’ll have to post about the tests later. I’d better get to work.

last-minute Earth Day gift ideas

Here it is, already Earth Day, and you’ve forgotten to pick out a gift for the planet. What could the Earth want that it doesn’t have already? Before you rush out to buy it a commemorative figurine, remember that there are lot of things you can do for the Earth without even leaving the house. (Or at least without making a special trip.) earth.jpg

When making your Earth Day gift-giving plans, remember “reduce, reuse, recycle.” We all know that slogan, but I think many of us associate it most strongly with “recycle.” But reduce and reuse can have the biggest impact.

During the past 35 years, the amount of waste each person creates has almost doubled from 2.7 to 4.4 pounds per day. The most effective way to stop this trend is by preventing waste in the first place.

So think about some of these gift ideas:

  1. Screw in a lightbulb. The Earth loves lightbulb jokes, like:

    Q: How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
    A: Two, but how do you get them in there?

    Actually, what I’m saying is change your lightbulbs. Replace your incandescents with compact fluorescent bulbs. EnergyStar.gov says:

    If every American home replaced just one light bulb with an ENERGY STAR, we would save enough energy to light more than 2.5 million homes for a year and prevent greenhouse gases equivalent to the emissions of nearly 800,000 cars.

  2. B.Y.O.B. Party at Earth’s place! (The Earth loves a party.) But the Earth thinks you should bring your own bag next time you go shopping. The Earth would love it if you’d stop getting so many plastic bags. They add up. Reuse some old bags, or bring string, or other fashionable fabric bags.
  3. Have you thought about sending the Earth a greeting card? The Earth says please don’t bother. The Earth gets too much mail anyhow. And the Earth thinks you get too much crap in your mailbox. Consider opting out of all those damn credit card offers, either online or by calling 1-888-5-OPTOUT. You can get off mailing lists for lots of places by filling out a form from DMA. For catalogs from businesses “with whom you have had a relationship,” you can call those directly. This site has more hints about reducing your junk mail.

Plus there are lots of other little waste-reducing gifts you can choose for Earth. Like avoiding disposable paper products, or using fewer of them. Opting not to print out papers, or to reprint on the backs of old documents. Or even just turning off the lights. And what’s really nice is that the Earth doesn’t mind if you’re late with the gift, or you can’t give that much. The Earth appreciates even the little gestures. The Earth is swell that way.

my favorite movie quotes

I like movies. And I like to quote things. I like to make lists. (I also like to enter //engtech group writing projects, and this latest one asks for posts about movies.) So here’s a list of movies I like to quote, and quotes from those movies.

My favorite movies to quote (and quotes from those movies)

  • Best in Show (2000)
    A movie about dogs and dog owners. Well, really more about the people than the dogs. But there is a dog show. And you do see dogs in the movie. But the dogs don’t have so much to say, so I haven’t quoted them.

    • “We met at Starbucks. Not at the same Starbucks but we saw each other at different Starbucks across the street from each other.”
    • I’ve been know to confuse people by stating “we both like soup.” Here’s a bit more of the quotation, from an interview with a character describing her relationship with her husband:
      “We have so much in common, we both love soup and snow peas, we love the outdoors, and talking and not talking. We could not talk or talk forever and still find things to not talk about.”
  • Cold Comfort Farm (1995)
    One of my favorite movies. It’s got quite a few quotable bits, most of which involve a bit of performance.

    • “Everybody loves poetry” (Or, “evereh-bodeh loves poetreh”)
    • “I saw something nasty in the woodshed. Something nasty.”
    • “There’ll be no butter in hell!”
    • I also try to throw the word “scrattling” into conversations on occasion.
  • This is Spinal Tap (1984)
    The groundbreaking rock mockumentary, or mock rockumentary. Who hasn’t taken the opportunity to point out when something “goes up to eleven“? (Because, obviously, that’s one higher than ten.)

    Nigel Tufnel: The numbers all go to eleven. Look, right across the board, eleven, eleven, eleven and…
    Marty DiBergi: Oh, I see. And most amps go up to ten?
    Nigel Tufnel: Exactly.
    Marty DiBergi: Does that mean it’s louder? Is it any louder?
    Nigel Tufnel: Well, it’s one louder, isn’t it? It’s not ten. You see, most blokes, you know, will be playing at ten. You’re on ten here, all the way up, all the way up, all the way up, you’re on ten on your guitar. Where can you go from there? Where?
    Marty DiBergi: I don’t know.
    Nigel Tufnel: Nowhere. Exactly. What we do is, if we need that extra push over the cliff, you know what we do?
    Marty DiBergi: Put it up to eleven.
    Nigel Tufnel: Eleven. Exactly. One louder.
    Marty DiBergi: Why don’t you just make ten louder and make ten be the top number and make that a little louder?
    Nigel Tufnel: [pause] These go to eleven.

  • “A Fistful of Yen” from Kentucky Fried Movie (1977)
    An Enter the Dragon parody of extraodinary magnitude.

    • “But it would be wrong” (This is from a scene when Loo is visited in his quarters by a scientist he has been sent to rescue. As he starts to explain his plans, she indicates that his room has been bugged, and points out a series of larger and larger “hidden” microphones. After he explains how their escape plans would be feasible, he says loudly into a nearby microphone “but it would be wrong.”)
    • “tough and ruthless” vs “rough and toothless” (From this line: “This is Buttkiss, Klahn’s bodyguard – he is tough and ruthless. This is Kwong, Klahn’s chauffeur – he is rough and toothless.”)

    (In case you’ve never seen “Fistful of Yen,” here’s a small taste that’s available on YouTube: the alarm scene.

  • The Princess Bride (1987)
    This is, without a doubt, my favorite movie to quote. (Also a great book to movie adaptation.) At one point, I could practically quote the whole thing. But I will spare you that, and just offer up a few choice bits. (If you’re itching for more, try the quotes listed on imdb. Or better yet, watch the movie.)

    • “Inconceivable.”
      “You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.”
    • “Am I going mad, or did the word “think” escape your lips? You were not hired for your brains, you hippopotamic land mass.”
    • Here’s another handy insult to offer up: “you warthog-faced buffoon”
    • Then there’s the incomprehensible quote by Billy Crystal as Miracle Max, as he express excitement over his opportunity to exact revenge: “I’m gonna xxx”. Some have suggested “I’m gonna [lick the dalmatian]”
    • “Rodents Of Unusual Size? I don’t think they exist.”
    • “Mawwiage. Mawwiage if what bwingv uf togevuh today… That bweffed awwangement, a dweam wifim a dweam.”
    • “liar! liar!”
      “Get back, witch.”
      “I’m not a witch, I’m your wife. But after what you just said, I’m not even sure I want to be that any more.”
    • And last, but not least, probably everybody’s favorite:
      “Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.”

    • site statistics

    so blue

    Feeling a bit blue, folks? Well I’ve got blue folks for you. A whole list of blue folks. Some serious, some silly. Blue-skinned, blue-furred or just blue in the face. Some people, some people-like creatures. One sort of blob. Plus one god.

    A List of Blue Folks

    1. Smurfs. (By the way, I’m actually very disturbed by the Unicef Smurf commercial. Which is I guess the message they were going for.)

      smurf.jpggrouchy.jpg-ette.jpg

    2. Sesame Street offers Cookie Monster and Grover.

      3. tv_sesame_street_cookie_monster_interested.jpggrover.jpgbloo.png

    3. Then there’s the more contemporary Bloo from the cartoon Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends.
    4. Blue Man Group. A group of men who are blue. Well, who paint themselves blue to perform some sort of performance. In the show Arrested Development, the character Tobias, a blue man who has aspirations to be a Blue Man, spends several episodes painted blue.

      5. bmg12_tn.jpgthe_tick.jpg

    5. The Tick. Mighty blue justice. A big blue superhero from the animated and live action TV shows.
    6. Various X-Men characters. The movies add one new blue mutant with each sequel. The first had Mystique, the second added Nightcrawler, and the third added Beast.

      m.jpgn.jpgb.jpg

    7. The Wee Free Men and other books by Terry Pratchett featuring the Nac Mac Feegle. Little blue people based loosely on the Picts of Scotland, who would paint their skin blue before battle. (See also Braveheart, which depicted blue face-painting that may or may not have been historically appropriate.)
    8. The Blue Fugates. An Appalachian family prone to methemoglobinemia, a medical condition causing the appearance of a bluish tinge to the skin. You can read more about them and other historical and mythical blue figures, like
    9. Blue Moovians. Ancient blue humanoids. Who knew?
    10. The Tuareg, a Berber ethnic group. Not actually blue, but

      The Tuareg are sometimes called the “Blue People” because the indigo pigment in the cloth of their traditional robes and turbans stained the wearer’s skin dark blue.

    11. The Hindu deity Krishna.* You can also learn more about why Krishna is colored blue.

      12. krishna.jpg

    *(Note: I hesitated to include Krishna in my list, even though he is so very blue, seeing as he is an actual god and all. I don’t want to be disrespectful. However, upon remembering that he is often depicted as a playful god, I hope that his inclusion in my playful list will not offend. (cf. This line from a story in Shri Shyam Katha: “Then the playful Lord Krishna said. ‘First you promise me and then I will ask for a boon'” (Note: I must share that the preceding quotation made me giggle, as my most recent encounter of the word boon was about something else.)))

    high school movies and clique taxonomies

    It’s no wonder I’ve been having traumatic high school flashbacks. In my class on Monday, there was an extended discussion of terms used to categorize cliques (and outcasts) at the various schools that people had attended. (Keep in mind, for most of the students in the class I’m taking, high school was fairly recent history.) This was all relating to our assigned reading, primarily a text by Penelope Eckert about an ethnographic study she’d done in an American high school. The Eckert text (the same one that had a sentence that made me laugh out loud) discusses the terms Jocks and Burnouts, terms used by the teenagers in the Detroit area suburban high school she studied.

    So the kids (yes, I’m freakin’ old) in the class were all relating the terms used in their schools. “We had jocks and greasers” or “we had preppies and townies”. Terms like “skaters” and “band kids” were bandied about. To be honest, I don’t remember all of what they said. I was too busy feeling old and having flashbacks to various movies that make reference to clique structure and terminology. Which is basically every American high school movie ever made.

    But lets go over some examples, with the terminology:

    1. The Breakfast Club (1985)
      This movie featured 5 students of differing categories: Jock, Princess, Criminal, Basket Case and Brain.
    2. Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (1986)
      This quote about sums it up:

      Grace: Oh, he’s very popular Ed. The sportos, the motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, waistoids, dweebies, dickheads – they all adore him. They think he’s a righteous dude.

    3. Heathers (1989)
      This movie has the exclusivity (and cruelty) of the popular clique taken to the extreme, with the 4 members (3 of whom are named Heather) called “The Heathers”.
    4. Clueless (1995)
      I don’t remember what terms this movie used explicitly, but I found this reference to the clique structure:

      On paper, Clueless would sound like just about any other high school comedy. It’s got the popular girls and the jocks, the dreamboats and the bitches, the stoners and the slackers.

    5. 10 Things I Hate About You (1999)
      One character gives a tour to another, a new kid at the high school, and explains the who’s-who of cliques:

      Over there you’ve got your basic beautiful people. Now listen. Unless they talk to you first, don’t bother.

      This movie went for somewhat exaggerated cliques, with Audio-video Geeks, Coffee People, White Rastas, Urban Cowboys and Future MBAs.

    That’s all I got for now. I’ll have to do more research into this issue at some point. (Translation: I’ll watch some high school movies.) I am on the lookout for new references on this subject matter. If anyone has any clique terminology to add, whether based on your own ethnographic studies, knowledge of the literature, or familiarity with bitchin’ high school movies, please let me know.

    crispy flakes of wisdom and crunchy nuggets of knowledge

    One of the prize books in my collection is a book by none other than J. H. Kellogg, M.D. Yes, of corn flakes fame. Many have heard of this notable personage from the book The Road to Wellville by T. C. Boyle (and movie based on the same).

    I stumbled across this book while browsing in a used book store in East Lansing, Michigan. (I was there for Linguistics Summer Camp.) Having heard of Kellogg, I was intrigued. And with a title like Plain Facts, and a publication date of 1882, I had to see what it was about. I opened the book to a page at random. And laughed out loud. I flipped through more pages, and laughed again. (snort, snicker…) I had to buy the book before I was thrown out.

    It turns out that the “plain facts” are all about sex. As written by someone who felt that sex should be avoided whenever possible.

    I don’t remember what the first passage I read was. But the beauty of this book is that nearly every page offers some piece of wisdom that I just couldn’t make up. I must share it with the world at large.

    For example, we learn from page 87 that young women must not get their feet wet at certain times of the month, or they may do permanent damage:

    A young lady who allows herself to get wet or chilled, or gets the feet wet, just prior to or during menstruation, runs the risk of imposing upon herself life-long injury.

    Even babies may be in danger from the “stamp of vice,” as we learn from page 183:

    Sometimes–rarely we hope–the helpless infant imbibes the essence of libidinous desires with its mother’s milk, and thence receives upon its forming brain the stamp of vice.

    And not to leave out the dangers to men, there’s page 366, which offers this dire warning about the perils of auto-eroticism:

    Many young men waste away and die of symptoms resembling consumption which are solely the result of the loathsome practice of self-abuse.

    So I offer to you a game. Please give me a random (or carefully selected by whatever means you like) number between 1 and 512, and I will attempt to locate some notable nugget of wisdom for you in the vicinity of that page.

    [Note: I’ll get back with the nuggets for you next Tuesday, April 10th.]

    5 5th things

    Here’s a list of 5 things of the 5th persuasion. Want to know more than that? I take the fifth.

    Five fifths

      5. Fifth Business, a novel by Canadian author Robertson Davies. Part of the Deptford Trilogy.

      5. The Fifth Dimension. An American band from the 60s known for songs such as “One Less Bell to Answer” and “Aquarius/Let the Sunshine In”. (Also amathematical abstraction.)

      5. a fifth interval. A musical abstraction. A difference between two notes in (Western) music theory. A perfect fifth is 7 semitones.

      5. The Fifth Element. A movie by director Luc Besson.

      5. The Fifth Elephant. A book by Terry Pratchett.

    (Note: I was going to submit this as part of the //engtech 5 things contest, but noticed that I missed the deadline. I have trouble with deadlines. But what the hell, I’ll post away anyhow. I like lists, I like things, and 5 is as good a number as any. And way better a number than 4.)

    I’ve got a lot of balls

    I’ve got balls. Bouncy balls. A whole lot of ’em.

    Here’s a list of some bouncing balls I’ve encountered. A list of 5 things of the bouncy ball persuasion. And a whole lot more balls than that. On with the bouncing!

    1. The Sony Bravia commercial. My sister sent me a link to this ad, which I hadn’t seen before. It features a whole lot of bouncing balls, bouncing down a street in San Francisco. And through the wonder of YouTube, I can bounce it to you here.

      The making of video is fun to watch, too. You can also read more about it, and see some cool photos. And want to get some balls of your own? Get a bunch of downloads.

    2. Want to know more about the bouncing of balls? Learn about the physics of bouncy balls, or about bouncing ball simulations.
    3. Here’s another bouncing ball commercial, this time for a museum in Mexico. Features a pair of balls.
    4. “Follow the bouncing ball.” Old-time TV (and movie?) sing-alongs used to feature a bouncing ball that would bounce along the words displayed on the screen. It’s a bit hard to find examples of this, though I came across a version someone random made and put up on YouTube. Or if you don’t mind being forced to watch an irritating ad, you can sing along with some old TV show themes songs with the help of a bouncing ball.
    5. My favorite balls of all are from the Futurama episode “War is the H-word“. (By the way, this is also the episode where Leela dresses up as a man, and where Fry buys his ham-flavored gum. For “breath as fresh as a spring ham.”) This episode features a planet of bouncing balls. And these fabulous ball-bouncing quotes, from the treaty negotiations with the head of the balls:

      We demand bouncing, followed by rolling, followed by rolling of the third type.

      and

      We cannot condone bouncing of the seventh variety.

      and

      The Elders tell of a young ball much like you. He bounced three meters in the air. Then he bounced 1.8 meters in the air. Then he bounced four meters in the air. Do I make myself clear?

      and let’s not forget when Leela says:

      We’re here. I followed the bouncing balls.

    bouncy_balls.jpg

    This post is being submitted to the //engtech 5 things contest, which strongly advocates bouncing of the 5th variety.