socks fiend

Yes, it’s true. I’ve been thinking about socks all the time. I even have friends feeding my socks addiction.

I’m turning into a real socks fiend.

Even more shockingly, I left a number of important sock-related things of last week’s sock-themed ThThTh list:

  • Let’s Talk About Socks: a George Michael song
  • I Want Your Socks: another George Michael song. That dude was seriously into socks.
  • Socks and Candy: A Marcy Playground song. Oh, man…what’s that smell?
  • The Socks Pistols: an early British punk band known for such hits as “Knitting in the U.K.”
  • Socks in the City: a TV show about some single socks looking for their mates. (Note: contains explicit laundry scenes.)
  • Socks, Lies and Videotape: security tapes reviewed after a series of thefts at the laundromat
  • The Opposite of Socks: A movie in which Christina Ricci comes of age and explores footwear alternatives
  • Socks on the Beach: an unpleasant footwear decision leading to much sand being collected between the toes. Also a fairly obscure and unpopular cocktail.
  • A Midsummer Night’s Socks Comedy: a movie about people who wear socks with their sandals
  • socks education: high school classes in which kids learn about foot anatomy and the consequences of socks. (Don’t forget the importance of safe socks!)
  • socks maniac: one who just can’t get enough socks
  • the fairer socks: should be washed separately from the darker socks
  • casual socks: shouldn’t be worn to a formal occasion
  • socks scandal: what may happen if you choose the wrong socks for the occasion
  • The Second Socks: Simone de Beauvoir’s less famous oeuvre on her collection of mismatched footwear
  • The Joy of Socks: the definitive volume on the pleasures of socks

the curse of the sock store

Quite a few years ago, long before we had kids, we’d occasionally go on a weekend getaway to stay in a bed and breakfast somewhere in New England. During one such trip, we stopped by a town known for its shopping. I seem to recall that we were heading to a game store. We saw quite a few other specialty stores, though I don’t remember what they were for the most part. What I do remember was seeing a sock store.

John and I had never heard of such a thing before, and we had a laugh about the idea. I mean, really, a whole store devoted to socks? Who really cares that much about socks? How could a store stay in business that really sold just socks?

However, we are nothing if not curious. So we decided to stifle our laughter as best we could and pop into the sock store to see for ourselves. As you might imagine, what we saw were a lot of socks. Seeing as we both had feet, and both used socks, we thought we might as well pick some up. I found a set of 3 pairs of socks in a sale bin, and John got some other socks. We made our little purchase and went our way, continuing to laugh at the supreme silliness of a sock store. We mocked the sock store.

However, it would appear that the socks must not be mocked.

For it turned out that those socks we had bought, the ones we picked up on a whim, they were really good socks. Once we tried them, all of our other socks became instantly inferior. They fell down. They weren’t as comfortable. The sock store socks became the favorite socks, sock favorites to a couple of people who wouldn’t even have believed that one could have favorite socks.

What’s more, suddenly we needed more socks.

We found ourselves seeking out socks, not just buying them willy nilly. Before you knew it, our sock stock had multiplied in size, as did our need to find better and better socks. We lamented that there was no sock store nearby. Our desire for socks could not be sated.

The only reasonable explanation is that we fell victim to the curse of the sock store. Having mocked it, we are now forever doomed to want more socks.

sock it to me

I just can’t get enough of those socks. I figure you can’t either. So, I’ve rifled through my sock drawer to share with you this sock-themed ThThTh list.

  • knock your socks off: an idiom meaning “impress” or “surprise in a good way,” as in The excitement of this sock list will knock your socks off.
  • put a sock in it: “be quiet.” (Differs somewhat from “put it in a sock.”
  • bobby-soxer: a 1940s term for a teenage girl, especially fans of Sinatra
  • The Bachelor and the Bobby-Soxer (1947): a movie with Cary Grant and a teenaged Shirley Temple.
  • sock hop: a dance popular in the US in the 1950s in which participants took off their shoes and danced in their socks
  • stocking_23

  • Christmas stockings: socks hung by the fireplace as part of a Christmas tradition. They are then filled with eggs by the Easter Bunny. (Do I have that right?)
  • Fox in Socks: A Dr. Seuss book (featuring a fox wearing socks) filled with particularly tricky tonguetwisters:

    New socks.
    Two socks.
    Whose socks?
    Sue’s socks.
    Who sews whose socks?
    Sue sews Sue’s socks.
    Who sees who sew whose new socks, sir?
    You see Sue sew Sue’s new socks, sir.

  • foxinsocksbookcoverpippi.jpg

  • Pippi Longstocking: A character from a series of children’s books by Astrid Lindgenwho wore socks that were not only long (long stockings) but noteworthy for being mismatched
  • Diddle Diddle Dumpling: a Mother Goose rhyme featuring (at least in some versions) stockings:

    Diddle diddle dumpling
    My son John
    Went to bed with his stockings on
    One shoe off and one shoe on.

  • bluestocking: a term for an “educated, intellectual woman” used commonly in the 18th and 19th centuries. Also Blue Stockings Society.
  • redsox

  • Red Sox: a baseball team based in Boston, MA
  • White Sox: a baseball team based in Chicago, IL
  • Chartreuse Sox: a baseball team based in my imagination
  • threesockmonkeys

  • sock monkeys: stuffed toys traditionally made from socks. (Perhaps less traditional is the sock monkey dress.)
  • sock puppets: hand puppets made out of socks.
  • sock puppet: a dummy internet account
  • The Scottish Falsetto Sock Puppet Theater: a sock puppet duo of YouTube fame

  • The Bureau of Missing Socks: “the first organization solely devoted to solving the question of what happens to missing single socks. It explores all aspects of the phenomena including the occult, conspiracy theories, and extraterrestrial.”

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the magic of Santa’s pants

‘Tis the season to be jolly. To deck the halls, hang the mistletoe, and face angry mobs at the mall while trying to find the right gift for Aunt Margaret that she’ll probably return or regift anyhow. But in all the hustle and the bustle of holiday preparations, let’s not forget about the important things. Like family. And friends. And pants.

I offer to you the Scottish Falsetto Sock Puppet Theater‘s memorable song, Santa’s Pants.

Thanks to raincoaster for spreading the love of pants, and the love of socks.