10 Classics of Pants Horror Cinema

Just when you thought you were safe from my pants, they come back at you with a vengeance! Hold on to your pants, as Pants Cinema presents these 10 Classic Horror Movies.

  1. Night of the Living Pants
    A group of people seek refuge in a farmhouse after radiation from a fallen satellite causes their pants to come to life.
  2. The Pants of Frankenstein
    After stitching him together from corpses and bring him to life, Dr. Frankenstein struggles to clothe his monstrous creation.
  3. Island of Lost Pants
    A shipwrecked man finds himself on an island inhabited by a madman who performs bizarre experiments on pants that were believed lost at the laundromat.
  4. Invasion of the Pants Snatchers
    A small-town doctor learns that the pants of his community are being replaced by ill-fitting alien duplicate pants.
  5. Rosemary’s Pants
    A young couple moves into an apartment only to be troubled by the appearance of a pair of pants that neither of them purchased.
  6. Children of the Pants
    Children in rural Nebraska are incited by a creepy young preacher to steal the pants from every adult in the town.
  7. The Amityville Pants
    A family purchases a selection of second-hand pants, only to be haunted by the discovery that the pants were worn by people with really bad taste.
  8. The Invisible Pants
    A mad scientist finds a way of making things invisible, but since he’s insane, the only things he cloaks with invisibility are his pants.
  9. Pants Sematary
    A couple is horrified to discover that pants fashions discarded in recent decades come back to haunt them, hideously altered.
  10. Dawn of the Pants
    Zombies rise from the dead and drive a small group of survivors to seek refuge in a secluded shopping mall, where they find great bargains on pants.

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This monstrosity of a post can be attributed to radiation emitted from this week’s Monday Mission, hosted by Painted Maypole, which causes innoncent-looking posts to take the form of a horror movie plot summary. Or in this case, 10 of them.

pants blogger slacks off

I haven’t really been slacking off, but I really wanted to use that title.

Anyhow, it’s been a busy week. We had our Halloween party last night, and I spent a lot of time the past few days cleaning, organizing, running errands and generally running around like a chicken with its head cut off. (That was not my costume by the way.) Maybe I’ll have a chance to write about the party (and our real costumes) a bit later. Right now we are running out the door to Ikea, resuming our quest to get Phoebe a big girl bed.

Like Magpie, there are a lot of posts that I have been working on. Some are drafts, some are still lurking around in my head. I’ll filch¹ Magpie’s idea to post a list of posts I have been thinking about this past week:

  1. I have several ThThTh posts in progress, but couldn’t find the time to shine one up enough to post. (Those things take a long time to do when I use images.) You almost got to see my ass post on Thursday. Well, you almost got to see a list of donkeys…
  2. Phoebe has entered the “why” stage. It sort of sneaked up on us.
  3. All this talk about Palin “dropping her Gs” makes me want to write a phonetics/sociophonetics post. (I had great plans to write on for this past Tuesday’s “Talk Like Sarah Palin Day” business.)
  4. I can’t stop thinking/reading/talking about the election.
  5. I am feeling really exicted about the election and the (dare I say it?) likelihood that Obama will win.
  6. Did I mention that I am thinking a lot about the election? And I am feeling some powerful optimism. My Republican best friend and I can talk about politics without fighting for the first time in our 20-year friendship. Today John sent me this link to a very short post this morning and I got choked up. And then this line from Magpie’s post gave me chills:

    My Republican father – who told me the other day that he thought Obama had the chance to be one of the best presidents ever.

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¹ The word filch is also something that I filched from Magpie…²
² I am declaring today to be International Filch From Magpie Day.³
³ Which reminds me, I should update on the last idea I filched from Magpie, for Blog Action Day. I owe Unicef some money…

election news in the Republic of Pants

Election day in the Democratic Republic of Pants is rapidly approaching, and excitement is growing over the race between the two major candidates, Trousers McPants and Corduroy O’Bloomer.

Speeches by both candidates have been striking some cords with large sections of the Pants Republic, leaving many pants feeling divided over the issues.

McPants has long suggested that the opposition pants are cut more for style than substance, and of a fashion that has not been worn long enough to stand the test of time. Recently, the McPants campaign has appeared at times to attempt to stain the very fabric of O’Bloomer’s character, bringing up associations with outfits that are considered inappropriate for the pair of pants that will cover the biggest seat of the Pants government. O’Bloomer’s campaign has responded that such threadbare associations are not material to the election.

At a rally last week, McPants promised that he would “beat the pants off” O’Bloomer, an off the cuff remark that led to outcries from the O’Bloomer camp. In response, supporters of O’Bloomer have suggested that Trousers McPants is not only cut of the same cloth as the incumbent, Jodpur Britches, but even getting to be frayed around the edges.

It appears that more and more prominent Pants Republic citizens are coming out of the closet to declare their belief that O’Bloomer is overall the stronger pair of pants, leaving some McPants supporters feeling that they’ve been hung out to dry. Among O’Bloomer supporters, the feeling is strong that if McPants wins the election, the population of the Pants Republic will be taken to the cleaners.

After the recent economic downturn, with recession looming and fears that the Pants economy is coming apart at the seams, citizens of the Pants Republic are eager to learn how the candidates will address the issues. As the Pants treasury does not have infinitely deep pockets, many wonder if the Pants government will need to tighten its belt.

Come hell or highwaters, one pair of pants will be chosen in the coming weeks. And right now, it looks like the Republic is ready to change its pants.

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This post was written for this week’s Monday Mission, hosted by Painted Maypole, which solicits posts in the style of campaign coverage.

A New England Fall day

I love this time of year. Fall is without doubt my favorite season.

Today was a crisp, bright day. We went to our local playground, and then headed to a farm to pick apples and pumpkins.

Phoebe at the playground.
Phoebe at the playground.
John and Theo at the playground.
John and Theo at the playground.
A tree at the playground.
A tree at the playground.
Leaves...
Leaves...
...leaves...
...leaves...
...leaves.
...leaves.
A reflection.
A reflection.
On the wagon ride in the apple orchard.
On the wagon ride in the apple orchard.
Pumpkins.
Pumpkins.

(You can find a few more pictures featuring Phoebe here.)

Obama: a little too awesome

Here’s Obama’s speech from the Alfred E. Smith Foundation dinner last night¹, in which we learn the truth about his name:

Many of you know I got my name, Barack, from my father. What you may not know is Barack is actually Swahali for ‘That One.’ And I got my middle name from somebody who obviously didn’t think I’d ever run for President.

Part 1:

Part 2:

Edits from 10/18:
For those of you wondering about the post title: we also learn about his hidden weakness:

If I had to name my greatest strength, I guess it would be my humility. My greatest weakness: it’s possible that I’m a little too awesome.

Edit from 10/21:
The clips I’d had up last appear to have been removed from YouTube. The clips I’m linking to above may not be up for long. Here’s the full dinner, with both Obama and McCain’s speeches and intros, can be found here. It will probably stay up, since it was put there by CSPAN. It)

There’s also a version up at crooks and liars that can be downloaded or viewed.
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Hat-tip to crooks and liars, via la loca.

¹ McCain also gave a speech, but I haven’t watced it yet.

think pink

It was recently pointed out to me that October is Breast Awareness month. Our society is far too oblivious to the existence of breasts. Every day, millions of women around the world have breasts. In spite of this, breasts go largely unnoticed by men, women, and advertisers alike.

Wait, maybe it’s Breast Cancer Awareness month. That probably makes more sense.

Pink has become the color associated with breast cancer awareness, originating in the use of the pink ribbon symbol in the early 90s. So this month seems a good time to bring out the pink things. In the spirit of my Themed Things lists of green, red and blue folks and critters, I give you a list of pink animals, characters and other creatures.
The Breast Cancer Site
Before the pink fur starts flying, let me direct your attention to the button to the right. If you click on that, you’ll be directed to a site that funds free mammograms to women in need. All you need to do is click a button. So…you know…click on it.

Ok, once more into the pink.

    Some Pink Creatures

  • The Pink Panther. A cartoon character originally appearing in the credit sequences of the (live action) Peter Sellers movie The Pink Panther (1963), but who later got his own TV show.
  • Barbapapa. A shape-shifting pink blob character who appeared in kids’ books and short animated shows. I have vague but fond memories of the cartoons from when I was little. I also had at least one of the books.
  • Serendipity. A bright pink, aquatic, dragonlike creature from the book (of the same name) by Stephen Cosgrove. (One of the first books that I ever read.)

  • several Care Bears are pink, such as the one called Cheer.
  • There are likewise various My Little Pony characters who are pink. (One called Pinkie Pie, for example.)

  • pink elephants Said to be seen by those who have had too much to drink. The expression seeing pink elephants is believed to have originated in a book by Jack London. Pink Elephants were featured in a scene in Dumbo (1941), along withe song “Pink Elephants on Parade.”
  • some Muppets are pink, such as one of the Martians, or “Yip-Yips.” (You can see the Yip-Yips discover a radio on this YouTube clip.)
  • Pearl: A pink octopus from Finding Nemo (2003)
  • the Energizer bunny. A mechanical drumming bunny toy with pink fur used in Energizer battery commercials.

  • flamingo. A bird with pink feathers, at least as an adult:

    Young flamingos hatch with grey plumage, but adults range from light pink to bright red due to aqueous bacteria and beta carotene obtained from their food supply.

  • Plastic pink flamingos are a popular lawn ornament in the US starting in the 1950s. They are often considered the epitome of kitsch.
  • Amazon River Dolphins. There is a species of freshwater dolphin living in the Amazon. For real. I actually saw some when I was travelling in the Amazon in 1991. (Or I may have possibly seen tucuxi, which are apparently saltwater dolphins, but live in the Amazon and can be pink.)
  • pigs. While the actual pigs I’ve seen haven’t been, pigs are often shown as pink in cartoons, toys, etc. The Disney version of Piglet, for example is bright pink. Cincinnati’s flying pig mascot is pink, as is the Kids in the Hall Flying Pig.

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image sources: Barbapapa, Serendipity, Care Bear, flamingo and elephant, Pink Panther.

Blog Action Day

Today is the second annual Blog Action Day, and the topic for the day is…poverty.

I admit that when I saw the topic, I was a bit overwhelmed.

I wanted to contribute, to add my voice to the thousands of others who are speaking out to make a difference in the world. But poverty? That’s huge. What can I say in a single post? Especially in the short amount of time that I have each day for typing.

But I realized that is the sort of attitude that makes it so easy to avoid doing anything at all. It’s too much to do? Better do nothing, then.

Well, I’ll fight that urge and do something. Not enough, certainly, but something. My 2 cents worth, as it were.

5 Things you can do to help fight poverty

  1. Write about an issue of poverty.
  2. If you are voting in the U.S. election, read up on the candidates’ plans for addressing poverty in the United States. (Obama and Biden have a detailed plan on their official campaign website. McCain has a paragraph.)
  3. Send a letter. According to Poverty.com, 22 nations pledged in 2002 to make efforts to give 0.7% of their national income in aid to poor countries, in the interests of ending hunger and severe poverty. 5 countries have already reached that goal. Other countries have established a schedule to reach that goal. 6 countries have yet to either reach the goal, or set a schedule. (USA, Canada, Australia, New Zealand, Japan, and Switzerland.) Ask governments to honor their commitment. The website provides letters that are all ready for you to print up, stuff in an envelope, and mail. (But you should probably use a stamp, too.)
  4. Make a micro-loan through Kiva. Kiva helps people rise out of poverty by connecting them with funding for their entrepreneurial goals.
  5. Pledge to make at least part of your holiday gifts work towards helping others out of poverty. Consider gift donations, such as to Heifer International.

Okay, I guess that’s sort of 2 cents worth. What’s more, I’ll put in more than 2 cents. I’ll put in my 2 dollars. I’ll follow Magpie’s lead. For every commenter that leaves a comment on this post in the next 24 hours, I’ll donate $2.00 to Unicef. (So up to 11:59 p.m. on Thursday, October 16th.)

an excuse note

Dear World,

Please forgive the recent behavior of our country, especially during this election season. Please understand that it has been a difficult 8 years for us, and that we have taken leave of our sanity. (See attached note from doctor.) We hope to recover from this ugliness soon, and will hopefully be able to make up for it come January. We hope that we will be given ample opportunity to earn extra credit in the areas of diplomacy, health care reform and intensive efforts to break ourselves of our debilitating fossil fuel addiction. Should we fall short in our efforts to make progress towards these goals, we will expect to receive detention and a very poor grade on our global report card.

Sincerely,
Some of US in the U.S.

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This post was written for this week’s Monday Mission, hosted by Painted Maypole, which called for posts in the form of an excuse letter.