The March Just Posts

Welcome to the March 2010 Just Posts, the latest (and in this case quite late¹) monthly round-up of blog posts on topics of social justice.

The March Just Posts:

The posts of this month’s roundtable were nominated by:

If you have a post in the list above, or would just like to support the Just Posts, we invite you to display a button on your blog with a link back here, or to the Just Posts at Cold Spaghetti. If you would like to have a post included next month, you can find out how to submit posts and all sorts of other stuff about the Just Posts at the information page.

Shortlink for this post: http://wp.me/p2jCr-1bK

¹ The lateness is in part be due to our having overdone things a bit in getting the Best of the 2009 JP project done. But done it was, if overdue. In sum, we’re overdue ’cause we overdo.

go fly a kite

Yesterday we decided to go fly a kite. (Well, we decided on Saturday, really. You can’t be too spontaneous about this sort of thing, especially if you don’t yet have a kite in your possession.)

Predictions were for a fairly breezy day, just right for kite-flying. We got ourselves out of the house early-ish, and headed over to the open space by the dam (where we sometimes go for walks).

It turned out that the location and conditions were pretty great for kite-flying. This was the first time that either John or I had successfully flown a kite. (Well, I only remember one attempt from my childhood, but I don’t think my sister or I had much idea what we were doing.) In spite of our lack of experience, we managed quite well, and we all enjoyed the time outside in the fresh spring air.

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I meant to post these photos last night, but couldn’t stay awake due to another mysterious fever. Have I mentioned that I also have poison ivy due to some poorly thought-out yard work last weekend? Somebody shoot me now.

for crying out loud

You know what? I haven’t had a full night’s sleep in well over a year. At 19 months, Theo still does not sleep through the night.

I could probably count the number of times on one hand that I have gotten a stretch of sleep that is longer than 4 hours. (Theo does sleep longer stretches than that, often from about 8:30 to about 2:30. If I could bring myself to go to bed at 8:30, I could probably get a 6-hour stretch…) Mostly, I go to bed too late, wanting to have time unfettered to get on my laptop and tend to other things. As a result, I rarely get to bed before 1 or 2.

Theo is still sleeping in our room, in a portable crib. At least for the first part of the night. After he wakes up in the night, I take him to bed with me. I don’t typically sleep all that well after that. 6:15, when the alarm clock goes off, comes all too soon.

What this means is that I am not getting enough sleep, and not nearly enough deep sleep. As a result, I have felt like I have developed a cognitive impairment. I have trouble focusing. My memory is leaky. My head is foggy. This does not lend itself well to making progress towards a PhD.

Something’s got to change.

I really didn’t expect Theo to still be sleeping in our room at this age. I think Phoebe started sleeping in her own room around 6 months old. When we were getting ready for Theo’s arrival, we got Phoebe a toddler bed so that the crib would be available. The plan was to move Theo in there, into Phoebe’s room, once he started sleeping well at night. (No sense in waking Phoebe in the night, right?)

So…that hasn’t happened.

It amazes me how different Phoebe and Theo are with respect to their sleeping patterns. Phoebe started sleeping through the night really early. Too early, even. We had to wake her to feed her in the night her first few months. It was a relief when she was gaining weight steadily enough that the pediatrician gave us the go-ahead to let her keep sleeping.

And then there’s the whole sleep training business. With Phoebe, she used to fight us at bedtime. It got to the point, maybe around 7 months, where we would be spending over an hour rocking her and singing to her to put her to sleep, and she’d spend most of that time crying, not wanting to go to bed. It made it easy for us to decide to try some “cry it out” sleep training. She was already crying anyway, and we were exhausted.

With Theo, we could put him down in his crib, and one of us would just need to sit near him a few minutes and he’d be asleep. There didn’t seem to be much urgency to change things, and things were so calm and quiet, with nobody crying. Now that he’s older, it’s a bit more variable, and sometimes he needs someone to sit with him longer to fall asleep.

But he still wakes up.

We even gave sleep training a brief go. 3 exhausting nights, with one angry baby screaming for over an hour. And no real progress. I think we’ve missed the optimal window for that.

I think that maybe if he’s out of our room, he’ll sleep better. Maybe having Phoebe in there will help him fall asleep without one of us needing to sit with him. On the other hand, he may just disrupt Phoebe’s sleep.

We’ve come really close to moving him out of our room several times. But somehow I always find reasons to put off the transition. (I hate transitions! I’m tired enough as it is, thankyouverymuch.) There were some practical concerns, too, though. Like needing to move the crib away from the lamp. Now the furniture is finally rearranged. And once we figure out a secure way to cover the outlet that is within easy reach of the crib (he pulls out the little plug things), I think I will be out of excuses. Theo will be moving in with Phoebe.

I just wish I knew how all of this was going to work out.

Theo, still not sleeping in the crib.

The Unbearable Tightness of Pants

Conflict.
Betrayal.
Angst.

Pants.

The Pants Institute proudly presents the Pants Cinema Film Festival: Masterpieces of Pants Drama.

Here are some of the films on the schedule:

    The Unbearable Tightness of Pants: A young woman feels increasingly uncomfortable in her pants, while her husband seems unable to keep his own pants on.

    What’s Eating Gilbert’s Pants: A young man is disturbed to realize that clothes moths have gradually overtaken his family’s closets.

    My Own Private Pants: Two misfit young men in misfitting pants embark on a journey to find pants that fit them more comfortably.

    The Last Pants of Disco: A pair of young women struggle to adapt to the changing pants fashions at the start of the 80s, and must bid their bellbottoms goodbye.

    Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Pants: When a man picks up his clothing from the drycleaners, he finds the pants that are returned to him to be hauntingly familiar, yet he can’t remember ever wearing them.

    The Remains of the Pants: An aging butler reflects on his life of service, and notices how threadbare his trousers have become.

    Pants in Translation: A young American woman visits Tokyo, and is unhappy to find that she can’t find the Japanese word for “pants” in her phrase book.

    The Pants Hereafter: A town struggles to cope with the gap left by the closing of a prominent pants retailer.

    Pants Labyrinth: A young girl tries on magic pants to escape the dark realities of her family life.

    Pants of a Lesser God: Not all pants are made the same. See label for care instructions.

    Pretty in Pants: A teenage girl runs into conflict when she announces that she wants to wear tuxedo pants to her high school prom.

    Edward Scissorpants: I can’t even go there. Ouch.

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I’ve been keeping these pants packed up for ages, and it seems a fine time to air them out.

The Best of the Best of the 2009 Just Posts

Strike up the band! Break out the champagne! Holly and I are ready to announce the results of the “Best of the Best of the 2009 Just Posts” voting. Can you believe we’ve finally gotten here? The imperfect process has taken us almost 3 months, and it’s been a remarkable experience. We’ve learned lots, and read and re-read lots, and been gratified by your comments and support. And we got lots of help, for which we are hugely grateful. Thank you, again, to all of you who read, reviewed, promoted, voted, and were otherwise there for this project. I could go on and on, but I’ll spare you. (For now. [cue ominous laughter])

And now [cue drumroll] the voting results, by category:

SOCIAL JUSTICE as political/legal :

SOCIAL JUSTICE as health/wellness:

SOCIAL JUSTICE as socio-economic inequalities :

SOCIAL JUSTICE as advocacy/service :

SOCIAL JUSTICE…

We have a prize for each of the post authors above in the form of a hand-made piece of New Orleans art (from Holly) and a bit of fair trade Theo chocolate (from Alejna). To collect your prizes, please send your snail mail addressess to Holly at (coldspaghetti at gmail dot com) or Alejna (alejna99 at gmail dot com).

And, for the post that received the largest number of votes in any category:
When is zero not really zero? When it describes your food. by Kimberly at The Gav Menagerie

Congratulations, Kimberly! We’ve got an extra special prize for you (and we promise it won’t have trans fats!)

Editors’ Picks:
And just because we’ve gone absolutely mad with power, we also wanted to recognize a couple more posts that, in addition to all those voices that have been recognized above, have really spoken to us. So we’ve got loot for two more, too! (Mind you, I wish we could send prizes to every single participant in the project: finalists, semi-finalists, and everyone who read, commented, posted and contributed in various ways. But that much fair trade chocolate and postage would definitely break the bank…)

I had a hard time choosing just one, as so many of the posts from the year really moved me. There are, for example, quite a few posts by authors in this lists above that have moved and inspired me. For example, Stacie, Emily, Erika and Jen have all written powerfully on so many different topics, and they each have written posts that, for me, really capture the spirit of the Just Posts: posts that bring in personal experiences to the larger social issue, posts that move me emotionally as well as make me want to act. But they each already have posts on the list above. I also really appreciate it when writers bring in humor to address serious subjects, and I confess that I am quite fond of submom’s All Things on Cable TV Considered, I wish my Hotel had Porn…. (Come on, is that a great post title, or what?)

In the end, though, I decided that I want to highlight a post that has really kept me thinking, for months after I read it: When Allies Fail, Part One by Tami at What Tami Said, as well as its companion post,Part Two.

I love that these posts gives practical advice on furthering activist movements, and in particular “maintaining alliances in the face of failure.” They speak to my periodic frustrations with some members of activist communities, where the discourse between those working towards the same ends is often more bitter and caustic than that directed against those who more actively demean marginalized groups, or who actively oppose the agenda of the activist movement. But I suppose the reason that these posts stuck with me most is that they speak to me as an activist, and to my ongoing internal struggles with my imperfect self. They lay out what it means to be a member of marginalized group vs. what it means to be an ally who comes from a more privileged group. They have helped me to process thoughts and actions in my own past that have shamed me, as I have bumbled along as a well-intentioned yet often insecure and under-informed individual.

Please also see which post Holly has chosen for her editor’s pick.

If you have a post in the lists above, we invite you to display a button:


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For more information on the Just Posts, please visit the Just Posts information page.

scenes from an egghunt

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(Now seems as good a time as any to try out the new slideshow function available from WordPress.com. What do you think? Do you like it better than scrolling down through a bunch of photos?)

no foolin’

Here are a few assorted bits of things that are going on with me:

  • I’ve had a temperature over 101 for most of the day.
  • As such, I’ve been pretty incoherent.
  • The sun finally came out today after days of rain.
  • We’ve had various rivers running through our yard.
  • We haven’t had flooding in our basement due to the rain
  • Though we have had some due to our dishwasher.
  • I’ve finally gone over to the dark side an joined Twitter.
  • (As threatened one year ago today.)
  • This time I’m not kidding.
  • I still plan to treat it all as a big joke.


Why, yes, that is a banana in my pocket.

talking tomatoes

We’re in the kitchen eating breakfast. Phoebe gets up to use the bathroom.

Phoebe: Don’t eat all the pear while I’m gone!
Me: I won’t. What if I eat all the oatmeal?
Phoebe: Don’t eat all the oatmeal! I want some.
Me: What if I eat all the sassafrass?
Phoebe: I don’t think we have any sassafrass.
Me: What if I eat all the… tomatillos?
Phoebe: I don’t think he would like that.
Me: [?] Tomatillo is a kind of tomato.
Phoebe: …that they eat in Spain?
Me: Does it sound like a Spanish word to you?
Phoebe: Yes.
Me: You’re right. It is a Spanish word.
Phoebe: Then they must be in Spain!
Me: I’m not actually sure. You know, there are other places in the world where they speak Spanish.
Phoebe: Tomatoes don’t speak!


Phoebe enjoys her breakfast with pears, oatmeal and reference-resolution adventures.